[PDF] Scared Selfless By Michelle Stevens – serv3.3pub.co.uk

[PDF] Scared Selfless By Michelle  Stevens – serv3.3pub.co.uk ✼ Scared Selfless Epub ✿ Author Michelle Stevens – Serv3.3pub.co.uk Michelle Stevens has a photo of the exact moment her childhood was stolen from her In it she's only eight years old and posing for her mother's beguiling boyfriend Gary Lunduist an elementary school t Michelle Stevens has a photo of the exact moment her childhood was stolen from her In it she's only eight years old and posing for her mother's beguiling boyfriend Gary Lunduist an elementary school teacher neighborhood stalwart and brutal pedophile Later that night Gary locks Michelle in a cage tortures her repeatedly and uses her to uench his voracious and deviant sexual whimsMichelle can also pinpoint the moment she reconstituted the splintered pieces of her life Just a few years after being confined to a mental hospital and at the mercy of an alternate personality who kept trolling for sadistic men she's in cap and gown receiving her PhD in psychology and the university's award for best dissertation The distance between these two points is the improbable journey from torture loss and mental illness to recovery that is Michelle Stevens' powerful memoir Scared SelflessGary Lunduist kept Michelle as his sex slave for six years During that time he waged a campaign of unimaginable cruelty He pimped her out to countless men for prostitution and forced her to perform in kiddie porn when it was legal and shown in Times SuareIt took fifteen years three hospitalizations and multiple suicide attempts for Michelle to work through Gary's dark legacy She suffered from post traumatic stress disorder PTSD anxiety depression and developed multiple personalities There was Chelsey the rebellious teenager who told her boss to shove it; Vicious a tween with homicidal rage; and Sarah a sweet little girl who brought her teddy bear on a first dateIn this harrowing yet unflinching look at her own experience Michelle who was inspired to help others heal by becoming a psychotherapist sheds light on the all too real threat of child sexual abuse and the psychological effects on its victims and best methods for healing based on her own struggle with PTSD and dissociative identity disorder commonly known as multiple personality disorder Scared Selfless is an examination at the extraordinary and inexplicable feats of the mind in the face of unspeakably horrifying trauma and the story of Michelle's courageous road to healing recovery and triumph.


10 thoughts on “Scared Selfless

  1. Michael Michael says:

    What an amazing book I was abused as a kid and for the first time in my life I feel like I understand myself This book is a gift to anyone who has ever suffered any kind of trauma It helps the victim understand him or herself and it helps others to understand victims I hope my wife will read this book I think it will help her understand me better and probably help our marriage


  2. Camryn Camryn says:

    This is tough to give this book a poor rating because this is tragic story of a woman's life as she remembers it For the things Steven states she experienced I can feel nothing except extreme compassion As a reader I have an individual reaction to how I received her story as a book and this was not a read I enjoyed at allMichelle's story was recommended to me as a possible resource for survivors of violence because I volunteer with RAINN and a few connected women's groups Others might read this book and come away with a different perspective than I have but I personally did NOT find Michelle's story to be an inspiring story of a woman's journey of healing It didn't even really document a journey of recovery from personality disorders and addictions but rather extensively expressed the pain and distruction of Steven's life In fact up until around 95% of the book Steven hadn't found any real healing She was hospitalized once again in the final portion of the book but she never really went into detail about how or why she had a miraculous breakthrough At no point did she never fully explained what brought about her healing Stevens has several personality disorders including borderline personality and DID and that was often very evident in how she wrote about people Everyone was always out to get her; everyone was incredibly cruel to her She goes into great detail how every single person who came into her life be it a nurse or a teacher or a friend managed to treat her with absolute almost ridiculous contempt I won't uestion the validity of her story or her how she remembers people interacting with her because I'm sure that's reality as she perceives it As a reader I personally disconnected with the story it read as sometimes a bit duplicitous or exaggerated at times Some aspects of her story just didn't add up to me and the severity of her abuse often seemedcontrived? HOWEVER under NO circumstances do I feel it's my place or anyone else's to weigh the truth or lies of another person's life story What I can weigh in on is how inspiring or triggering this story might be Stevens sometimes goes into uncomfortable detail about her abuse but I never really connected the dots or saw a clear path of how she recovered or found a way to thrive She just informs us in the final pages that she is indeed thriving and is now a therapist for others a slightly alarming prospect uite frankly There are multiple examples of profound books that document the healing progression of people with psyche disorders one of my favorites being I Never Promised You a Rose Garden which is based on the author's own journey of recovering from schizophrenia and multiple personality disorders Scared Selfless just never had a real character arc However it seems to me the act of retelling her memories was cathartic so I applaud Stevens for that There are some things I think people who are interested in psychology might appreciate in this book Stevens explains what it's like to live with DID multiple personalitiesdissociative identification disorder and how those personalities formed I'm still really uite confused with how DID works and why Stevens apparently had complete awareness of her all personalities etc but uite frankly DID is something that is still mind boggling to behavioralists and psychologists to this day What this book does successfully do however is draw awareness of how easily pedophiles can prey on their targets It's a wake up call to parents to be incredibly constantly vigilant Overall this just was a miss for me and not a book that I would recommend to the women in the groups I volunteer for My rating doesn't reflect my opinion of Michelle Stevens or her life but rather my ability as an individual reader to connect with her story I think other people will and have read this memoir and have very different feelings about it


  3. Carol Carol says:

    When I was handed a galley of this book by a dear friend of mine I didn't think much of it I'm a magazine editor and see lots and lots of galleys and books But once I picked this up I literally could not put it down The author recounts some of the most horrific abuse I have ever encountered in a book or on the big or little screen And as much as I recoiled at the details—as much as it hurt to read what was done to the author as a young innocent girl—I felt profoundly inspired by the author's courage and ability to shine a light on what few have survivedand even fewer have survived psychologically intact enough to then turn and expose This book is a good in the world—brave and strong and true I only hope it inspires women to step out of the shadows and expose evil to the light of truth


  4. Samantha Ann Samantha Ann says:

    This book is changing my life I am just now opening up and started therapy And to help me open up i went on a man hunt at barns and nobles to find a book to help And already being a huge fan of Dave Peltzer I looked at books in the same sections I started to read Scared Selfless and didn't think I would be able to read the whole thing It was to much for me and being a VERY emotional person i felt so hard for Michelle When I got to Conseuences I began to underlining your words It was ME You were telling me who I am Why Im that way and its not my fault So now Im almost done the books and only 3 sessions in with my therapist but you have helped me in ways then you will ever now by being as brave as you are You opened up my eyes in so many differents ways So thank you from the bottom of my heart Samantha Wheeler 3


  5. Scott Scott says:

    Now this was mostly one hell of a disturbing and depressing book and I hesitate to say I enjoyed it as the root subject matter a young girl forced into sexual abuse accompanied by prostitution and pornography involvement and then her later struggles with her mental health will rightly sound horrific to some readers However Dr Stevens writes about her life experiences with a comfortable almost conversational style that even includes some effective humor on occasion I was riveted by her story see sawing between feelings of anger disgust and sadness and finished the book in just two days The abuse that happened to her starting when she was eight years old was unthinkable and medical system that largely failed to provide adeuate assistance to her as an adult was unacceptable Thankfully she survived she persevered and I'm glad she had the chance and the courage to tell her story


  6. Marianne Mason Sievers Marianne Mason Sievers says:

    I have to admit that I started reading this with a great deal of trepidation and yes I did feel alternately sad sickened and angered by what I read; ultimately however Mooch's story evokes awe that she was able to come through such traumatic experiences and achieve the happiness and success that she hasAnd Mooch if by chance you read this I want you to know that you rocked your role in The Bad Seed You and Marah were a formidable pair as the leads


  7. Wendy Darling Wendy Darling says:

    45 stars Especially fascinating because the author became a therapist and is able to offer uniue insights into her horrific situation and the monster responsible for it It’s also very well written


  8. steph steph says:

    The author's note at the beginning asks the reader to stick through the hard parts of the book because its worth it I am so glad Michelle added that because I really did have trouble through the graphic grotesue and gut wrenching horrific acts and situations that her stepfather and other adults put her through and I might have put it down otherwise When she got mad at the adults in her life I got mad at the adults in her life WHY DID NO ONE RECOGNIZE THE SIGNS AND STOP IT? Ugh But oh Michelle Michelle is a fighter She is a warrior She preserves and has come so far and I closed the book on a good note because through her story she educates and inspires others who have gone through what she has gone through She is a good therapists because she knows exactly how it feels to have a bad therapist etc I am in awe of her and the way she has taken what happened to her and turned it around to assist others Just wow


  9. Carla Golden Carla Golden says:

    This book is a testament to the strength of the human spirit Michelle Stevens who is now Dr Stevens a psychologist shares her harrowing story of childhood abuse and her journey to healing and helping others It is well written a page turner and an inspiration Once I started reading her book I could not put it down


  10. Nina Nina says:

    It is hard to describe how important this book was to me Working as a psychologist myself this was like finding the famous needle in the haystack When I stumbled upon it on audible i knew it was about trauma but I had no idea that it also was about multiple personality disorder and that the author a psychotherapist was the one sharing her story When I first listened to it my boyfriend heard the first chapter too Unfortunately he couldn’t stomach the horrible abuse Stevens has experienced as he started to think about his own daughters For me it was impossible to put down It was such an emotional journey taking me from despair to horror and then hope There has been such a long time since a book managed to evoke these feelings in me and I realized one thing Humans must keep searching for stories like these When you realize there’s always hope That we truly are survivors no matter what we’ve experienced I will take this book with me in all conversations with my lovely clients from now on And if I ever feel hopelessness or that I can’t offer anything I shall remember that is just not true By loving what you do and remembering why you do it we can all change lives Ourselves and others Thank you Stevens for sharing your story


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